- Classification: Ageing Training Destroyer (Former Destroyer of Merit).
- Complement: 200 “specialists” and rotating Midshipmen under training.
- Armament: “Deadly Decorations.” The primary 5-inch bow gun is neutered, and the missile systems are gutted—replaced by multi-colored lights that blink with no tactical purpose.
- Operational Status: On its last legs, held together by luck and the sheer ignorance of its commanding officer.
- Program: Circumnavigation of Australia and visit to PNG. Sydney, Port Fairy, Albany, Fremantle, Port Headland, Darwin, Port Moresby and return to Sydney.
The Lore: The HMAS Mulga is a ship of masks. To the Navy, it is a training vessel; to Captain Doherty, it is a stepping stone to his Admiral’s rank; but to the crew, it is a “floating circus of incompetence”. The ship’s lore is defined by its arduous journey from port to port around the Australian coastline and into the waters of Papua New Guinea.
The Mulga is where the “stupid flourish”. From the bumbling Captain and Coxswain to the constant mishaps to the “dance of the flamers” in PNG, the ship’s history is a catalog of incidents that the Navy would rather forget. Yet, beneath the surface-level bumbling lies a narrative of profound loyalty and secret protection. The ship serves as the unlikely meeting point for the elite, the incompetent, and the criminal underworld, culminating in a finale so explosive and dramatic it makes blockbuster movies feel calm by comparison.